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Monday, January 18, 2010

Day Seventeen, Gift Seventeen

This day was especially difficult for me...mostly because I really expected to feel quite good after staying in bed the whole previous day. I woke up around 10:30am, the reason I slept so late was our new curtains kept the light out. I didn't feel quite right but I was sure if I pushed myself to get showered and dressed it would be all down hill from there. It wasn't unfortunately, I was barely able to get dressed and downstairs before crashing on the couch. I laid there for several hours, my ulcer pain was just unimaginable. The kids kept asking me to do things...I could only lay there with my eyes closed going in and out of sleepy consciousness. I couldn't even watch TV or read, I was that uncomfortable.

By around 1pm, I had had enough of it and I pulled myself off the couch and told Tim I was going to the grocery store. Again, I was sure, if I only got up and going, I would feel better. I walked at a snails pace through the store trying to buy only the essentials. My energy was dwindling by the second. I found that I couldn't even bring myself to smile at the people I passed, I was so miserable. I typically smile and talk with everyone in the grocery store...it felt so foreign to be so anti-social.

When I made it to the check out line I had a hard time unloading my grocery cart. I had happened to go to Walmart where they don't put the bags in the cart for you. As I loaded the bags in my cart I got so dizzy I almost fainted right there on the floor. I was able to stable myself and regain control and drank some of my vitamin water. I slowly but surely loaded the car...as I drove home I saw a couple riding bikes and then a young family pulling their little ones in a wagon. Oh...sigh...what it would be like to go on a walk or a bike ride, I thought... discouraged.

I pulled in the drive way and went in the house, straight to the couch, I almost didn't make it I was so dizzy. I tried to recover until about 7pm when I suddenly realized I hadn't done my gift for the day! I was distraught for just a moment and then I realized the only thing I possibly could do would be a phone call. That narrowed things down and I remembered I'd been really wanting to call my brother who I hadn't spoken to in many weeks. I wanted to compliment him on a gift he had gotten Abbey for Christmas and tell him how she carries it everywhere with her! I knew he'd be thrilled. As we talked I made sure to compliment him...things I am always thinking, but maybe never remember to say. We had the nicest conversation and I told him about my blog. Last time I knew, he didn't have the internet...so I hadn't even told him about my challenge because I didn't think he'd be able to see it anyway! To my surprise, he does have Internet now and I sent him the link right away. Maybe we'll get lucky enough that he'll post a comment.

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