Saturday, January 9, 2010

Day Eight, Gift Eight

I'm finding that I have more reflection on my gift if I blog about it the day after.  I hope, you, my readers, don't mind waiting the extra day to find out.  As the day presents opportunities for gifts, I have to pick and chose what I can do for my gift and what can wait, then I find I relect upon it throughout the day and night.  I am much better prepared to write about it the following day.

So, yesterday was day eight.  I decided again, not to "pre-plan" my gift as God continues to present me with opportunities to do for others and this day was no exception.  Yesterday was a bed rest day.  I woke up completely and totally exhausted.  I had exercised quite a bit the night before...I kicked Tim's butt on Yoga on the Wii, although, he really did outdo me on hula hooping.  I tried a new game, it was bike riding, oh my, I was running on that thing until my calves were screaming so was constant charlie horses.  But my competitive spirit would not let me stop!  So I continued to the finish...I was so tired at that point that I couldn't hardly pass the finish line, I kept hitting the pole next to it.  Tim was bent over in hysterics as I smashed into the pole over and over as I moaned and groaned from the pain in my calves.  Anyway, I eventually got past the pole and crossed the finish line...sigh.  It was great fun even if I was in severe, overwhelming, and unimaginable pain.  I know the Wii Fit was a gift for the kids...but, I don't think they use it half as much as Tim and I do...he he he.

So, needless to say, I think that game is what did me in and I spent the whole next day in bed.   Tim took Justin to the Dr's for a post op check up from a surgery he had recently.  The plan was that he'd be gone a couple hours and I only had Abigail and big deal, right?  Wrong!  Nothing ever goes as planned.  Abigail comes to my bed and says, "Poop, Mommy"...I look down and was so thankful that she is not leaking out of her diaper. I reach over the bed and plan to clean her up and have her cuddle in bed with me to watch cartoons...wrong again!  I guess this whole "planning" thing isn't working for me!  As I pull down her pull up, liquid poop comes flooding out everywhere on my carpet, yikes!  My adreneline kicks in and I lift her into the master bath shower and start it running.  I pull off her pull up in there where the liquid poop covers the bottom of the shower...sigh.  I called one of my respite providers and asked her to please come help.  Someone had given my Abbey milk...she is lactose intolerant, this is always the result of her drinking milk.  One of the hardest things about being sick and a self proclaimed protectionist is that things happen that wouldn't had happened on my watch (or so I think)  :-).  Many of times has Abbey taken Jamie's milk and drank it on my watch.  She loves milk and Jamie is blind, so Abbey steals her milk and food without her noticing!

While Abbey stood in the shower updating me on the poop going down the drain, I grabbed cleaning supplies and started scrubbing the poop trail to the shower.  I was so weak that I barely made it back to bed when my mom called.  Now, normally in this situation, I try to ignore my phone.  But my poor mother is so worried sick over me that if I don't pick up she just about makes herself throw up.  So regardless of the situation, I pick up when she calls...even if it's several times a day.  I love her and I can't imagine how painful it is to watch your child be sick...what I love though is it is always matter of fact.  I can say, "I can't talk I'm sad" or "I can't talk I'm angry" or "I can't talk I'm sleeping" and she accepts whatever roller coaster mood I'm in.  Lucky for my blog readers, I only blog when I'm in a positive place, my mom and family are not quite so lucky!  They get the full Jekyll and Hyde effect and unfortunately there is no warning between shifts in moods.

I was explaining the whole story to her as my respite provider (thank you for coming so quick) popped into my bedroom.  I told her the situation and she went right to work.  One thing about being ill and having special needs children, you lose all privacy.  I don't really remember what it is like anymore.  There is always a respite provider or therapist in my home at all times.  We don't have any "private" moments...they are my best friends and family.  They've seen me at my worst and at my best and are just wonderful.  I couldn't get myself dressed the other day after getting out of the shower and the kids were all over my of my respite providers came in and scooped them up and handed me my medication while I stood there in a towel.  It's sorta sad I don't have those basic private moments but it's so much better that I have such a great support system.

So after my respite provider was able to get Abbey cleaned up, I knew I was going to be in bed all day.  The fatigue was just unimaginable.  I have a small group of five ladies that I'm really close with who all have many, many children and one called me.  She happen to mention that one of our other friends was really struggling with her health (which I knew) so she was hiring the lady that I made the food basket for to go clean our sick friends house for a surprise.  It would be a "double" gift because the first lady was in desperate need of work and our friend was in desperate need of help.  I asked if I could go in on it with her and another friend and she said "yes" my gift for day eight was to help pay for our friends house to get cleaned...and since three of us went in on it, it was very inexpensive!

I have so much more to share with you all...but I am quite exhausted for the moment.  I only have a few more days of weaning off the bad medication and have not had any naseau for several days.  This gift giving challenge has kept me positive through this difficult process of healing and I am so blessed for that, I feel a happiness that is so deep and real.


Anonymous said...

In reviewing your blog,
I just got your comment about cleaning snow off from others cars. What a great idea. Since my neighbors all keep their cars in the garage I will do this at work. I am sure people will be thrilled to come out and find their cars cleared off.
Yesterday I drove a friend's son to the Upward Bound program about 1 hour away at one of my former colleges and waited for him for 2 hours. He can drive but they can't afford snow tires and you can't drive in Vermont without them. While waiting I went to an old stomping ground of mine ( years ago when I was in college) and found that the breakfast that they serve is as good as it was back then. Then I visited the bookstore and found a book that I had read years ago and wanted to keep it on my shelf. I think I have bought it at least a dozen times but always give it away. It is called The Four Agreements. After that was the grocery store. It worked out great i picked up a few things that I knew I was going to run out of. If I hadn't made this trip I would have waited until I did run out and have to bundle up and make a special trip. So ... doing this for my friend helped me to get some things done and gave me a nastalgic feeling from my college days of over 30 years ago. Thank you for helping me to think of others more intentionally. Over the past several years since my children have left home I find that I really have had the attitude of a princess or I guess at my age it would be a queen.

Desiree said...

Well, you are a queen :-)...that was a wonderful gift and I'm thrilled that it gave you back so much! Thank you for taking this journey with me!