Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Day Eighteen, Gift Eighteen

Today was much better than the past two! It was was Martin Luther King, Jr. day so all the kids were home. Tim had asked me if I would mind him going motorcycle riding with his buddies on Monday morning and he'd be teaching a class until 10pm. I thought that wouldn't be a problem and I booked my respite provider to come at lunch and stay through bed time. I forgot, however, that all the kids would home all morning and I'd be by myself. It all worked out though...he left around 8am as we were all getting up. I felt so good waking up, clear headed and energized. I said to myself "Finally!!!"

I was able to get all the kids fed and at least partially dressed for the day. Dakota and I did a great lesson on Martin Luther King, Jr., and we plugged away at a math assignment. My respite provider came over and got the kids going with lunch and took over while I headed down to the doctors office. My natural doctor seemed quite pleased with my progress in the past couple weeks and we discussed test results, hormone levels, thyroid, etc...and of course, my 500 calorie per day diet. I'm in the first phase...I will be eating only 500 calories per day of chicken, spinach, apples, and melba toast for the next six weeks. I will be taking a hormone that will make it so that I am not too light headed, dizzy, hungry, etc. I've done this successfully in the past, but I did evaluate my past roadblocks and I'm trying to knock down those obstacles ahead of time.

First, I didn't always have my special food prepared, so this time, I am cooking all six weeks of food in one day and freezing it. I'm doing this tomorrow morning, so I've been collecting the things that I need to do this. My second road block was that I was still cooking for my family every night, which was very tempting, so with our cooking co-op, Tim has agreed he'll serve dinner while I work on my blog upstairs to avoid the temptation. Lastly, I found that it was difficult to stay on the diet and do everything while I was working around the clock and managing a high stress load. I am no longer working and making it my main objective to not stress so I'm in a better situation to completely and totally focus on the diet. I will be seeing my doctor every Monday morning to monitor my health and progress...I still need to do 90 mins of strength training (PT) a day, no aerobics, and my decompression every week, my massage every week, and my it's a busy schedule.

After meeting with her, I rushed around doing errands and at this point, I'd been pretty much up and going all day long. Then about 5pm, it hit...I was dizzy, irritable, overwhelmed. I had called my mom and she asked me to give her a gift today and to promise to stop using my cell phone in the car. We have had this discussion many times before and while common sense tells me not to use a cell phone in the car, my life with five kids was crazy and work was crazy, etc, and that was the only time I was able to get my phone calls done. I very, very grouchily agreed that this would be my gift. I'm not thrilled about it because it will be such an inconvenience, but at the same time, I know in my heart she is right and therefore, I am committing here and now that I will not answer, dial, or talk on the phone while driving in the car.

By the time we got off the phone, I was beyond grouchy, just down right in a foul mood and by 6pm I decided I was going to bed. Well, my body pain got the best of me and I was still tossing and turning around midnight when Tim walked through the door. He could tell I'd been trying to sleep for some time. "What can I do?" he asked gently. While still in uniform he rubbed my arms and legs to try and minimize the pain until I cried myself to sleep.


Anonymous said...

Hi Desiree
It sounds like you are having a real difficult time lately. I am going to
pray for you and hope that you get enough energy to just live without pain
for a day.
Thank you so much for pouring your heart and soul into the blog and with
trying to inspire everyone everyday.
I am sure that sometimes you feel so bad because you can't get out of bed
and do the things you want to do but just know that even from bed you are
inspiring hundreds and through them (thousands) of people to make a
difference in someone else's lives.

Just think, you are doing more in bed than millions are doing healthy and
I am interested in all you write and particularly interested in your
financial tips. I am so doing them and want so much to provide for my
children when I am gone.
I am reading a book, 90 minutes in heaven, and it is just amazing to look at
what some people can endure in different situations. In this book by Don
Piper, he states he was feeling pretty down as he was bed ridden for like
two years. As he was depressed about what he would never be able to do
again, someone inspired him to start writing down all the things he could do
which cheered him up.
If you do this list, include a "passing it forward" inspiration to others
that will carry on for a lifetime.

Hope you are having a better day...


Desiree said...

Thank you Jessica! That was just the email I needed to help me get uplifted on a discouraging day!!!

I will keep giving out the financial tips, but the best thing you can do is start with "Dave Ramsey's, Total Money Makeover"...It will completely change the way you think about money (in a great way!!!)

I would love to read the book you've suggested, it will be next on my list!

Thank you for the recommendation...